// newmodernscience

Ok, so since I’m sick, maybe I should actually blog something.  Hmm.

The last 9 months have been a whirlwind of keeping up with trends in social networking and media, research and implementation. The church website is running on a customized version of Wordpress, configured as a content management system. We have podcasting, and a blog ( at least we would, if someone would ACTUALLY BLOG, and i’m not talking about me!), a Flickr gallery, a Facebook page and a Pinger account. We’re about 50% into implementing a decentralized ASP church management database, which is already working some incredible wonders with our data. I’ve got it tied into Constant Contact for email marketing, and we’ve even got it tied into mobile carriers so we can text message out assignments and reminders to volunteer staff. I’m in the middle of transitioning all of the staff from using Microsoft Outlook, to decentralizing their communications, contacts, and event management by switching to Google Applications.

All this? has left me creatively drained. I have a few moments here and there where I’ve been able to create some art, but nothing substantial. I play drums every once in a while for different ministry functions, but sometimes it feels like stress release rather than worship. Sometimes I long for a job where I can disconnect, and just focus on family and domestic stuff at home. I’ve got a lot of little projects in the wings, but lately it seems that if I’m not working, I’m still working. I do my 8 hours, go shopping for dinner, come home and cook it, spend a bit of time with my family and then stay up to 2am working on freelance jobs that we need to make it through the month. I liked it back when I could do freelance work because it was nice extra money. Now, I’m scrambling to take on projects when I already have too many, because we NEED the money to get through the month.

So, music? Songwriting? Photography? You can guess how often that stuff happens. I have actually, forced myself to take some sporadic moments to get a few musical thoughts out, snap a few pics. I got rid of a bunch of gear that had been sitting around gathering dust, unused, and condensed my setup down to some basic essentials. One of the things that I’ve discovered about my creative side, is that I need a big block of time to devote to a single project to get any headway on it. That’s why the late nights. I tell everyone to go to bed, and hole up in my studio working on projects. Little chunks here and there kill my creativity, and it’s wasted time. I DO gather ideas in bits and chunks though, and try to set aside a time to develop them. I have a little folder with little melodic snippets and drum loops, text files with song names and content ideas, a folder of inspiring pictures. I even decorated my office with some graphic design prints to stay inspired. I almost miss that year and a half of being unemployed when I had time to really think about life, ideas, and the people around me.

I’m trying not to sound like I’m complaining. Am I complaining? I guess in the large picture of things, I feel like I’m struggling not only to balance my personal goals and desires with family and life responsibilities, but also trying to feel out if my goals are in line with what God would have me used for, and if I’m really in a place where the talents and gifts that He’s given me are being used to their full potential. Maybe it’s time to consider a change of scenery?